Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Operation Fat Baby

It's probably just going to end up being Operation Fat Brandy, but whatever. Pregnancy is stressful enough under these circumstances and stress might make a certain someone want to eat. A lot.

As I walked out of TCBY this afternoon with my strawberry frozen yogurt, some guy made sure to ask, "Is that for you or the baby?" I honestly looked around me to see if there were other customers he was talking to because I didn't know what he was talking about. Oh, that thing in my belly? Ah, right. Yeah, it's probably just for me. Thanks for asking, inappropriate stranger. Since I often choose to forget there's a little human setting up camp in there, it was weird to hear that out of the mouth of a complete stranger. Then I realized that he doesn't know anything about me and most certainly has no clue that I have such sensitive issues surrounding pregnancy and babymaking. Most people don't-- I'm just the anomaly.

I have a particular affinity toward things made with processed cheese (Cheetos, Cheezits) or anything fried. This could be a very bad situation, especially if strangers feel the need to point out my calorie consumption on the regular.

Hi, my name is Brandy and I consume way too many calories. Oh, and I don't care what anyone has to say about it. If someone could guarantee me a healthy, screaming, fat baby at the end of this whole ordeal, I would literally go buy out the entire potato chip aisle at the nearest market. I have no shame.

Mine will definitely (or we'd have serious issues) not be Asian or this much of a chunker, but it wouldn't be a proper fat baby post without a visual of sorts. Totally necessary, right?


Emily said... [Reply to comment]

Brian has been tracking Kaia's weight since she was born and due to her harness we hadn't weighed her in awhile...until last night. When he entered her weight into the graph on his iphone we noticed quite a STEEP incline trend developing over the last month or so (even minus the weight of the harness!) So on the good side: YEAH SHE'S GROWING... On the (possibly) not so good side: Am I over feeding her? Could this mean something bad? Should we cut back her food intake??! But she's hungry?! IS THAT NORMAL???!!! Just one more thing to stress about!

By the way, I noticed your cute little baby bump in your last post. I didn't want to say anything in case you were sensitive about it. But in case you were wondering it does look cute on you! Definitely more baby than fat. See, us dead baby moms understand... Apparently a lot better than random Joes on the street who toss inappropriate comments at bypassers. Honestly. Tact much?

Renel said... [Reply to comment]

My son was in the 95th% for weight and height = fat ball. Fat babies are awesome...the baby you put a picture of...well it looks like a total chipmunk haha. I was never the type to not eat whatever I wanted during pregnancy. I gained 48 lbs with my first and 38 lbs with Camille. Your body does what it will with all the food. If your hungry...eat. TCBY makes sweet babies. :)

Jill said... [Reply to comment]

AHHH! Congrats mama!! I had no idea you were preggo! I gotta catch up!! I am so happy for yoU!!!

LauraJane said... [Reply to comment]

That is one chubby-cheeked infant. I love it. :)

Jack was small, 7lbs and consistently 49% on his tests. I like to think of him as perfect, and also like to think he would have chubbed up in time. :)

Ps. dear stranger: since you find my baby bump something for public consumption, would you like to discuss your impotence? No, okay then. Have a great day! ha!

Addi's mom said... [Reply to comment]

mmmm your post made me hungry! haha

Addi was 8lbs and just the perfect amount of squish...oh how I miss her squish...

Wishing for lots of fat healthy babies in 2012!

PS LJ's letter to the stranger is PERFECT hahahahahahha

Caroline said... [Reply to comment]

go on with your cheesy self!

ASP said... [Reply to comment]

I say go buy the whole dang potato chip aisle! Also, that baby's face totally looks like it's photoshopped between 2 butt cheeks. ;)

Tiffany said... [Reply to comment]

Who says that?! Seriously people need to shut it!

I say eat away. It's better than puking up everything in sight- especially if it is TCBY- I wish we still had them there- I would almost certainly be eating some right now!

LookItsJessica said... [Reply to comment]

mmm TCBY and cheezits...

Kristin said... [Reply to comment]

Haha! I am into processed fake cheese too! Cheezitz are my fave, especially dipped in Franks hot wings sauce. And cheetos, cheese whiz, kraft singles...mmm.

Solange, Nik and Caitlin said... [Reply to comment]

Eat all the chips you want man, no one will judge. And if they do, then just ignore since it's none of their business anyway! You totally made me hungry for chips and cheese.MMMMMMM.

That fat baby is SO cute. Really chunky monkey! :)

Becky said... [Reply to comment]

Holy crap those are some chubby cheeks:)
With Liam I put on so much weight right away because I crazed carbs and salt. Favorites were cheezits, goldfish, boxed mac and cheese, and pretzels with cheese. I've been told you crave what your lacking, so eat away if that's what you want.

Amelia said... [Reply to comment]

I've been eating nacho cheese with tortilla chips like it's going out of style. It's an interesting change to go from dieting for oh, 2 years? To...well, eating. I'm just trying not to overeat. We'll see. :)

Ben and Katie said... [Reply to comment]

Looks like those are not face cheeks yet rather bumm cheeks that has eyes in the wrong place! But then how can I talk...I have dimples dwn there and they should be on my face!
We have lime berry here and I love!!!

Alison G. said... [Reply to comment]

I might have called that guy a turd right to his face. Guess what I'm making for lunch right now...grilled CHEESE.