Foodie Resolution: Blueberry Biscuits & Red Lentil Tacos

We had a small amount of blueberries in the fridge and I wanted to be creative with breakfast one morning. And ironically, my boys just kept sleeping and sleeping. To the point where I woke them up!

I saw a recipe recently using up blueberries and biscuits. Two things I love. Confession: I could gobble up KFC biscuits and I don't miss the gravy one bit.

Apparently in the south, there is a restaurant called Bojangles. I think I've seen these in airports, but otherwise I'm unfamiliar. Pretty sure it's chicken... right? Either way, that is what inspired the recipe from its creator.

We thought they were nom nom, 5-stars delicious. {Recipe here} With or without the glaze, but I personally like any excuse to slather something with a sugary glaze. These would also work just fine using frozen blueberries. Or chocolate chips. Or...

This next one is totally an inspiration from a friend. She posted a photo of her lentil tacos on instagram and I immediately went to Pinterest to find a recipe. I pinned it and weeks later, we were eating some delicious tacos. Lentils are a great alternative to beans, refried beans, or meat. They're high in protein and iron and hearty.

I cooked them just as the recipe called, but left them just a little runnier than hers appear on the recipe. I used the tomato sauce, onion, garlic, cilantro... all things the recipe called for and they were quite tasty. If you cook red lentils longer, they'll break down and become smooth like mashed potatoes. If you cook them with less time, they will resemble lentils, but will still be soft and smooth. Red lentils are unique in this way and other lentil varieties keep their form.

This recipe makes enough for two meals, easily. My friend topped hers with roasted veggies, but I went the traditional taco route and used taco toppers. You can also add in your favorite meat and just used these as a bean substitute with a little in your tacos for a new flavor.

Another nom nom, 5-star recipe. {Recipe here}

Right Where I Am: 2 years, 7 months, 24 days

I planned to write this a long time ago. But somehow I never got around to it and while my thoughts are constant, my writing is not.

We're closer to 3 years without Andrew than we are two. Or one. Though, my memories of the day I met my firstborn are still quite vivid in my mind. I'll admit, I have to look at his photos to perfectly remember his cute nose and beautiful lashes sometimes, but the memories of what it felt like to hold him for that short time are still so vivid. The rush of sadness and love is still so memorable.

We were at Costco yesterday and Benjamin managed to find a little girl and her two brothers. They were eating at the food court and the 4-year old boys got up to walk somewhere. The dad called their names to get their attention and it caused Ray and I to look at one another with our jaws dropped. The twins boys were Andrew and Benjamin. So that's what it's like to have siblings that are both alive and with the same names you carefully chose for your own children.

It still makes me infinitely sad that I cannot introduce my Andrew in person (or let him introduce himself!). And it makes me sad that Benjamin will never know his "big" brother, who ironically is and will always be much smaller than he. The sting of losing Andrew is still sharp and I'm still angry about it. My friend commented recently to me that although Benjamin never met his brother, the firstborn, he acts as a second-child. He's more cautious, curious, subdued and observant.

At this stage, I boldly proclaim that I birthed two beautiful boys when other moms at the park ask about how many children I've had. I'm far past the stage of caring about making others sad or disappointing them with news. I am proud to be a mother of two boys and will stop at nothing less than to honestly share our story. It helps me honor Andrew and it forces others to face the reality of loss and that it's perfectly normal to be transparent about sadness in our society.

It still opens up doors. I still meet other moms who lost children and go on to share about their losses when I open up about my own. My mentality stands that if my reality of loss is uncomfortable for them, we don't need to carry on as friends.

One of our new friends we met at storytime has been dealt a rough road of multiple miscarriages and complications related. We were at the zoo recently and she asked if I'd ever attended a grief group, because she recently attended one and found it helpful. I talked through all the reasons I never did, and then explained how blogging and our recent BLM meetup is daily therapy for me. That in the earliest days, I had support from all over the globe at my fingertips and not just on the last Tuesday of the month at 7 p.m. It made me wish she and all of the other loss moms out there had the same support I feel so lucky to have.

I am so grateful for the support. While I don't blog about grief daily based on lack of time (surely not lack of thoughts!), I'm still living and tearfully remembering all we've come through over these last 2 years, 7 months, and 24 bloody days.

Right Where I Am at 6 months
Right Where I Am at 1.5 years

The Best Day of My Life

Today, we celebrate five years married.

The days my children were born were not the best days of my life. Au contraire. The best day was marrying the best person I'd ever met in my life. The person who knows me better than anyone, supports me, and stands with me when the days seem unbearable. The one that cried on the couch with me day after day month and still loves me in that brokenness.

We usually celebrate specific days with the meals we ate on those days in real life, but we're switching things up a bit and going hibachi tonight. For our first date anniversary on May 28, we go out for Asian food. On June 15, our engagement day, we stay in and make burritos, just like we had the night we got engaged in Ray's Manhattan Beach apartment.

On our wedding day, we had a Mexican buffet complete with beans, steak and chicken fajitas, tortillas, salsas, guacamole, tortillas, and more. When we went to taste and select the menu from our required caterer for our reception location, we kindly asked if we could decline all of the package options and go with Mexican instead. Without hesitation, they were on board and the food was exceptional! I've never had Mexican food at a wedding, before or after our wedding, but it still remains my favorite food ever. And just to be even more cultured, all 100+ of our guests were eating their Mexican feasts at a Japanese garden! If you remember, my mom and I took B back to that garden to feed the Koi fish earlier this year during a visit to the motherland.

To celebrate our 5th anniversary (other than being traditional and actually buying something made of wood for my husband!), I wanted to share five of our favorite wedding photos. There are so many, but here are five...

The doors on the left were open and the breeze from the Pacific was amazing.

Photos after on the side of the church.

Back inside the church for more photos-- it was an Italian-inspired mansion before being sold and converted to a church.

Not sure what the conversation was here, but it made for a pretty fun photo.

Japanese garden reception. Our table was on the dance floor and was removed for lots of dancing later!

Just like losing Andrew, I'm all too aware that these years we have together are precious. I'm so thankful to have them and continue to cherish every moment we spend together. Hoping for many, many, many more.

Windy City Smokeout

I was listening to the radio a few weeks back while driving around somewhere and heard an announcement that Pat Green (Texas country) would be coming to Chicago. Now, he's a lesser-known country star, but he does get played on the radio from time to time.

For us, however, his music is wrapped up in all kinds of amazing memories.

That's the thing about music. It really brings memories (the only things we really get to keep in life) to the surface and reminds us of how great we've had it. I can name quite a few bands that are wrapped up in the other half of my sadness (Dashboard Confessional and pretty much anything by The Band Perry), but music really does offer a great release of emotion and love. As an aside, I recently heard the 20-something (omg, that dates me BAD) library guy talking to other people about Jimmy Eat World. They had no idea who the band was, and I felt pretty proud and young in that moment. Though now that I type, I'm feeling pretty pathetically old.

While we were dating, my cute East Coast boyfriend introduced me to the music of Pat Green and we went to a few shows back in LA. Most notably, I remember seeing him at the House of Blues, Hollywood. It still gives me goosebumps thinking about dating the most wonderful man I can now call my husband of almost 5 years (Friday)!

Back to that car ride. I called Ray immediately and told him Pat Green was coming. Without hesitation, he said we were going and he'd be buying tickets. A couple weeks later and we found ourselves downtown at a BBQ and music fest with a few friends. It was a day of music, BBQ, and exploring downtown with our little boys. 

When we arrived, we headed to the fest and everyone but me (and B of course...who thinks food is for suckers) ate BBQ lunch. There were Chicago BBQ joints and some from other parts of the country, including Austin-- which I appreciated because they had the single item I could eat at the entire joint-- coleslaw. Benjamin and his friend both received their first ever hand stamps of a pig with a frying pan. Also, it's hard to see, but Benjamin and I are standing next to a WHOLE PIG in the picture below. They even tried to hand me a piece of pig from the belly after the photo was taken. And one questionably inebriated lady kept walking up to Benjamin with her little dog whom Benjamin was not too sure about. He loves animals, but she was making the dog dance and it was just plain weird. His face says it all.

The heat was close to unbearable, and after lunch we headed for a walk to Millennium Park. No swim gear, but it didn't seem to bother Benjamin who was owning the Crown Fountain. He was loving every minute of his freedom and befriended people of all ages, including three teenagers (bottom left).

We attempted to dry off a bit wearing Dad's polo (and looking overall adorable in it) by visiting the Cloud Gate, aka "bean". It was Benjamin's first trip to the bean and he seemed to enjoy it as well. He was running all over stalking other children and attempting to climb in their strollers. We passed by more art on the way back to the fest. But first, we stopped at the Protein Bar for an early dinner for the vegetarian of the group.

More BBQ was eaten and more music. Benjamin quite possibly loves my friend Liz over me, and if she is around, he is sitting with her instead. Group shot before heading back to the 'burbs after a fun night of food, exploration and fun! And, Benjamin (and his friend) can check their first concert off the list!

Foodie Something or Other: Coconut Milk & Strawberry Banana Popsicles

I can't pretend to be following a resolution anymore. It's embarrassing to even say, but I have only made one loaf of bread in the past few months. And my freezer is jam-packed. It's been that kind of season, I guess. At least there's a lot of frozen fruit and veggies in there.

I wanted to capitalize on the amazing deal I got on organic strawberries at Whole Foods the other day and make popsicles for us to enjoy in the intense heat we've been having here in the Midwest. And I have 3 cans of coconut milk that are practically begging to be used. Pair that with always having bananas in the house means I had myself quite the combo! I won't pretend this was my idea, and instead found the recipe here.

We have adult-sized pop holders that will run you around $12 on Amazon and kiddo ones that are about $7. And you guys... B loves these popsicles and I love that they're easy for him to hold. And, they have a built-in drip tray. He pulls them out of the freezer himself and about loses his you-know-what if we take too long getting one to him after they're in sight. I feel pretty good about them being healthy for him and adding a little extra fat from the full-fat coconut milk, too. It makes the bars more creamy than icy, though coconut milk does have coconut water content in it, which makes the adult pops slightly icy if you prefer to bite the popsicle. If you wanted them really creamy, you could pour out the coconut water in the can and just use the creamy content. Make sure you're using a powerful blender and few to no frozen ingredients though, as blenders do need some liquid to help the process along.

Here's my method for cutting strawberries... it wastes the least amount and leaves them looking quite pretty! 1. Remove leaves. 2. Using a paring knife, cut out the core. That end waste was from 24 strawberries!

Ingredients:

1 can coconut milk (or equivalent amount)

12 ounces of strawberries

1 fully ripe banana

1-2 TBSP honey (I used agave)

1 TSP vanilla (optional)

Of course, like all recipes, you can use what you have and go with your own flavor pallet. Blended, this will make about 4 cups. I made 6 full-sized pops and 8 kid-sized pops out of that amount. The kid pops only come in a 4-pack, so I left the mix in the fridge and just refilled when the first batch was eaten.

Super tasty and the little guy can't get enough!